The mind is a funny thing.
On a daily basis, I don’t know if I actually SEE myself. Know what I mean? David recently wrote a post about this.
Sure, I look in the mirror and get ready for work each day, but there are the moments when I walk by my full length mirror and I’m taken aback. When I don’t know who that person in mirror is.
I’ve lost 150 pounds. That’s a person! That’s another me! But I just don’t always see it. I don’t see myself as the girl on the left anymore. I’m not sure if I even recognize her. But to be honest with you, I don’t see myself as the girl on the right most days. I’m somwhere inbetween. It’s funny how your brain gets stuck thinking you look one way, when you’ve completely changed.
I’m too hard on myself. Too critical. My stomach isn’t flat, my thighs are too big, etc. I’ve spent so many years focused on what is wrong with my body that I don’t always see what’s RIGHT with it.
This morning, after I got done with my run, I was changing to hop in the shower. When I saw myself in the mirror I was surprised. Surprised at how strong I’ve become, how lean. How my body looks in and out of clothes. It was a “Come-To-Jesus-Moment” if I’ve ever had one. Clarity. Peace. I finally SAW myself. Saw the power in my legs, not the fat. Saw the strength in my core and stomach—not the fact that it isn’t flat yet. Saw muscles and cellulite…things that make me, me.
And that was powerful.
Stunning realizations for a Friday morning.